Fist Full of TBucks

The Chronicles of
"Singin'" Archibald J. Slinger

 

The sound of gravel under my boots- the sun hitting my eye making me squint,  an "El Cheapo Producto" cigar clenched in my lips... and then, there he was, at 50 paces...like the devil himself...Rastus Blackstar... ready to draw a paint blaster on the first bell of High Noon.... the dust swirled up like a twister near the saloon, the "Can Can" was playin' in the background.  I already spotted the dozen or so other rifles pointing at me from the rooftops and doorways in this dusty two-bit minor's camp.  Who's turn was it gonna be....me or him... in thirty seconds we'll see who's going for a dirt nap... 

"Horsey" my hoverbike was stashed inside the livery barn, next to the blacksmith's shop. Rastus Blackstar twitched. The katydid over in the tree stopped buzzin and the air went still. Fifteen seconds. I looked into Rastus's one good eye for that, legendary second twitch, when his boys were gonna plug me, regardless. Just then a thunderous sound came from above. 

It was Rosey Blossoms in her wild west hoverboat. I knew this was my only chance to escape the painty fate that lay before me.
I jumped up and for a split second there it was... the little blue action-tag...I had to get a solid click on it, it was my only hope... 

It’s funny how the mind works in those desperate moments. How one can be aware of what's happening in every way, right down to the smell of leather chaps and rubber hoverboat.  Never mind the fact that as I was leaping up, Rastus and his boys all began firing at me like there was no tommorow.  And then there was that little blue action-tag... I felt a slow-motion reality engulf me, frame by frame and ...click!  *autoseat* right into the hoverboat! YeeeHaww!

Rosey with her cowgirl hat, was hunkered down at the controls.
"take us up" I sounded confident but I was shaking in my boots. Up we went, paintballs whizzing by like a storm of little rockets. Somehow without words, Rosey and I regarded each other's thoughts as bein' on the same track, we wheeled around and took the Blackstar Gang from the sky and sent half of 'em searching for cover, while at least a couple were skiddin' face down on the dusty hardpan of outer Zephyr. After a lengthy paintgun fight, we'd finally skeered 'em off!  Those mean old rustlers sure took a lesson that day! If I ever get the same chance, I would do it all again. And Thanks to Rosey for makin' it work out so well.  I will never let Ol' Rastus rob ANY innocent noobie of his Therebucks, ...and thats what started this whole thing!

Soon, it was time to be ridin' my pal "Horsey" off into the Thereian sunset.

The End