Buddy Talk

By Nyllone

 

I am not much of a “profiler”, but there are a few times when I would take a peek at some profiles.  Reasons for doing so can range from interest, to curiosity, to boredom.  I was waiting for Phonk to get online, when I thought of checking my Buddy List.  I opened my organizer and checked profiles of some of the new additions to my list, having just attended some events during ThereGames.  After which I checked some profiles of the buddies that I have for a while now. 

 

It was interesting to note how some of them have leveled up, spiced up their profiles with creative pictures and descriptions about themselves.  I felt good having them as buddies.  Until I saw one profile and it showed he has no buddies.  I went back to my Communicator to re-check because I was sure I have him in my Buddy List, and I was right.  But apparently, I was not in his.   

It made me a bit sad.  Then again, I was still thankful I am not in his ignore list.  Or so, I think…  I know there’s no way of telling who in my Buddy List has me as their buddy as well.  I cannot force them to put or keep me there.  Much like the people who added me in their list, but aren’t in mine.  Which made me think, what does friendship mean in a virtual world like There? 

For someone who takes There as “just a game”, to get Legendary in all skills, get a good lap time, be one of the best racers, buddies do not really matter.  Sure, there would be acquaintances, but these acquaintances won’t get to see themselves as part of a gamer’s buddy list.  They will always be just acquaintances.  Random people.  Once they get Platinum and Legendary in everything, it’s game over.  They would just log on once in a while, to check if there’s anything else they missed.

  

For someone who takes There as a social community, to meet people from all walks of life in different parts of the world, you’d see this member’s profile with lots of buddies on their list.  Perhaps more than the people who have the member as their buddy.  I have one in my list, and she could really pass for Miss Congeniality in Miss There Pageant.

 

 

But it is not in the number of your buddies, nor the people who have you as their buddy that defines virtual friendship.  It is in the amount of time you spend to get to know each other.  The conversations that go beyond hi, hello, and how are you.  It is in knowing what the other person goes through in RL, not just the avatar that represent him/her.  It is in caring.  It is in the trust.  It is in the follow-through.   

Sure, I delete names in my list once in a while.  I’m sure other people have deleted me as well in theirs.  Reasons could be personal, or it’s just because the name is really not familiar.  Funny thing is, even if I delete a person from my list, that person can still see me log in and log out.  That’s the downside.
 

I think “being friends” has to be a mutual decision.  But still, I cannot not be nice to those who consider me as a buddy.  Nor should I be mean to those who deleted me from their list.  This maybe what the person who doesn’t have any buddy in his list has been doing.  So what if he has no buddy, at least he’s nice to those who have him as a buddy.   

I know it’s trivial whether I am in one’s buddy list or not.  It shouldn’t really bother me at all if one deletes me, or ignores me for some reason.  People do that.  It’s inevitable.  I may keep some deserving buddies in my list, and delete some as well.  So, it’s all good. 

But the true test of virtual friendship is when it doesn’t matter if they’re on my buddy list or not, because they still remain as my bestest friends in There and in RL.  As long as they’re not typing ||||| |||.